They've taken the floor off the porch. Bare. Exposed beams and 26 years of darkness. Rags, pans, leaves all brought to light. Accumulated through the years. Like our sins. Hidden where no one can see. Private. Yet choking. Holding you in bondage. While you wallow in the dark. It isn't until the exposure that the cleaning; the healing, can begin. The light transcends the darkness . It shatters what was. There is relief when the dark is illuminated. Hiding takes work. Much to conceal. In the revealing ... View Post
It’s The Receiving That Is So Hard
He's here. A man who offered to pray for our family 1600 miles away. He has connections and mutual friends here in the area. He prayed. During those long months of chemo and radiation and dense fog. He prayed; for us. When I could barely put a foot in front of the other. He prayed. He sent encouraging e-mails. A stranger. Now friend. Brothers and sisters in Christ. He wanted to do something. Something for us. We didn't know what to say. And now he's here. How do you say anything when ... View Post
Finding The Fullness Of Joy
She's 17 today; this sweet girl that has taught me so much about life. The girl who lost her dog and brother in a 2 week time span. Her Nana 7 months before that. Then the shocking walk of her father through cancer. This girl who walks in strength and grace. Whose smile and laughter light up a room. Her spirit; gentle and soft. A life surrendered to the King of all Kings. Practical like her dad. Free spirited in so many ways. She'll celebrate without her older brother to cheer her on. Her confidant. Her role model. She'll cross another milestone. I fear the ... View Post
All In The Same Moment
This time last year we had been in Maine. We came home. It was so quiet. No white tornado puppy to great us. I had been thinking about our home going and what it would be like. How quickly my son would experience that journey. Each step of every day draws me closer to the anniversary of the day. We attended a Birthday for a sweet One year old. We sang Happy Birthday and she opened her presents. On the TV ran photos of my children when they were little. Pictures of Elijah. His blue eyes ... View Post
Funding A Memorial
We've begun to advertise. An event. It's hard to think of it as a celebration. A Memorial Fund. A hope. A dream. A desire. A legacy. A way to help; give back. Money that will be collected and placed in a fund to grow. We have already begun to give. A College Scholarship. Donations to the Band and Lacrosse Team. In the future maybe 2 or 3 Scholarships. Maybe Leadership Scholarships for aspiring Military students. A way to keep his memory alive. To be the hands and feet of Christ. Giving. As ... View Post
I Am Found
Each day I read last years post. Counting down the days of his life. Searching for meaning. Something I have missed. Like an addict looking for a hit. I want to see something. I long for just a glimpse. It consumes me; if I let it. How I want to touch or feel something connected to him. These final days of his life. He would live for 19 more days. That is it. I didn't know. My son. Full of hope; a future. We were mourning the loss of our puppy. Still grieving my mom, my parents dog, my dad's ... View Post
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