My waking thoughts are gratitude. A grateful heart. Temperatures have fallen and the house is a mere 56 degrees. I run the dryer and turn on the gas fire. I wrap a shawl around my shoulders as I pour my hot coffee. Each morning my farmer prepares my coffee. A timer set to brew moments before I wake. I am grateful. These frigid temperatures make everything more difficult. My farmer works extra hard to manage the farm. He adds extra layers of clothing, his primary concern; the cows. With a partial roof over the barn the cows have a bit of reprieve from the brutal weather. I am ... View Post
30 Days of Thankfulness, I’m Still Processing, Day #5
I'm still processing. People ask me how we're doing. You know they care. They look you in the eye. They ask you that deep question. How are you? Most of the time I say, "I'm still processing." Last night our girls, with the Vermont Youth Dancers, had the opportunity to perform on the stage at Spruce Peak Performing Arts Center. What an amazingly great opportunity. It's been just the distraction we've needed. Watching the girls do what they LOVE. (There are still tickets available!!!! Just go to Spruce Peak Performing Arts in Stowe!) But it's also about being ... View Post
I sit, in the Midst of the Chaos
The towel is over my shoulder. Waffles are warming in the oven. The farmhouse kitchen is a wreck. So is every other room in this old Farmhouse. The floors, table, ottoman. Cluttered. Papers, socks. . . the vacuum. A trail of the day metered out as if to find the way. 'The way where," I ask? Where are we going? Where are we headed? I sit. In the midst of the chaos. In the midst of a mile long list. I sit. The youngest farm girl switched Pandora to a Classical Christmas Station. The usual Christmas music changed up a bit. Not familiar. Different. Beautiful. So, I ... View Post
This Old Farm House Day #20 of Thankfulness
This old Farm House. With it's broken windows and peeling paint keeps us entertained. The farm boy and girls are fooling around; he slams the door; a little too hard. In the morning a rescue is made. The door is locked. So through the window and down the ladder the girls go. Surprise! We're ready for breakfast. Never a dull moment. I could go on and on about the things wrong here. Ceilings with water damage. Oh, how I long for them to be painted. Clutter. A fifty year old carpet, that I would love to remove. On and on the list goes. Until. I breathe deep. Take a look at ... View Post
Lots of Celebrating in Heaven
He'd be 74 today. His birthday so close to his first grandchild. Today. They celebrate together. In heaven. Life has been full here. School starting. College girl back to school. The oldest farm girl leaving those sweet farmettes to impart knowledge on the next generation. The farm boy restless again. Searching. Stretching. The younger two growing. Blossoming. Here I am in this sea of emotions. Swept along. Washing clothes, planning meals, doing bookwork. Discovering a quiet house every once in a while. A strange sound. Today, I think on my dad. I miss him. The whole ... View Post
Really. It’s a Celebration.
It's my son's birthday today. He's 21. We had talked about this day. What he might like to do. It is was in the future, though. A future he never saw. What do you do when it's a celebration and all you want to do is utter gutteral screams? The ugly truth stares at you. Taunting. The memories. The never will be's. It's a birthday celebration. Life. But he's not here. All the years of cakes and parties. Careful planning. Presents. Dinners. Celebration. Life. This is his 4th Birthday in heaven. I've missed his 18th, 19th, 20th and now 21st birthdays. Because of ... View Post
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