The sun shone through the windows casting rainbows everywhere. Two little girls that were visiting, valiantly tried to catch them. Such a beautiful day. That sun, streaming through the windows though, showed the dirt and grime. A reminder of all I have neglected through months of cancer and grief. I stifled the self pity and pulled out the paper towels. I washed with a vengeance. I wiped away dirt and spider webs. No matter how hard I try. I can not wipe away my circumstances. They are here to stay. Embracing the journey is the only ... View Post
When You Feel Defeated Before The Day Even Begins Day # 11 of Thankfulness
I wake to a raging headache. CT scans, phone calls, all swim in my head. It's later than what I want. I feel defeated before I am even out of bed. I need to make breakfast, but I can hardly see. I want to just re-post yesterdays things I was thankful for, because today, I really don't want to be thankful for anything. I just want to go back to bed. Did you see it? Can you hear it? It's all about "I". The way to destruction is to fill your sentences with "I". What "I" need, what "I" want. Each time it will lead you to the ... View Post
They Will Never Be Forgotten Day #10 of Thankfulness
They willingly go. Something about the call. A camaraderie. A duty. Our Veteran's. Bound by a creed. Actions speaking louder than words. Old and young. Single or married. It matters not when the call arises. They, are our Veteran's. Our son. His desire. To be a Marine. He longed to serve. Test scores high; College material. Not for him. His heart; enlistment. He was not yet 18. I wrestled and struggled, not my will but thine. I respected the call, I signed for my son to ... View Post
What Does Trust Look Like When You Have Lost So Much? Day #9 of Thankfulness
He, the farmer junior, has gone to a banquet with a friend and her family. She, the farmers daughter, is at work. Each time they leave, I hold my breath. Will they return? I become paralyzed, sometimes, when I don't hear from them. When I don't know what time they will be in. I sit and I wait. My heart weighs heavy. My thoughts run to accidents and death; police and funerals. It is work to grieve. It is work to trust. Because in that trusting it doesn't mean your wishes and desires will be heard. Praying for protection for ... View Post
Some Days I Find It Hard To Be Thankful Day # 8 of Thankfulness
Do you find it difficult to be Thankful some days? The effort it takes to clear away the negativity; overpowering. Your mind fills with the, "what you've losts" and the, "what's wrong's". It feels trite to dig for Thankfulness. Sarcasm fills the soul. It's an easy place to step. A pity party. Soon we are covered in a nice cocoon of "woe is me." We are entitled, right? The rain and dreariness outside has come to reside on the inside. But, take a closer look at the soul. The place where most refuse to travel. Pain and heartache stuffed for ... View Post
A Cold Bedroom Day #7 Of Thankfulness
Posting from the archives today. Remembering we are beautiful." God makes beautiful things out of the dust. . . out of us. "(Gungor) I pray your Thankful journey is rich and changing you. I have learned a few things over the years about not heating the bedroom: 1. I don't need a wine cellar. It's the perfect temperature. 2. Oil of Olay does not contain water. 3. Oil of Olay does not freeze. 4. Oil of Olay Moisturizer hurts to put on when it is 52 degrees 5.This is not an add for Oil of Olay 6. Never put your clothes on in the bedroom unless you have warmed them first. 7. ... View Post
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