I stand in that country church. The strains of the hymn surround me. "Amazing Grace, How Sweet the Sound" The song sung at our sons funeral. I can't sing. I close my eyes and let the music hold my soul. I lean into the ache. I lean into the strength that is beyond me. Amazing Grace. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We woke in the early hours to find a mess at the barn. Ok, there was already a mess with barns torn down. This was an unexpected, never happened before mess. Grain. Everywhere. The auger must have stuck open and dumped 10 tons of grain on the ... View Post
Are You Content?
Lent is almost over. We're heading into Holy Week. So many choose not to observe these practices. This year I have struggled to stay focused. The discipline and reach for more; difficult. The connectedness with my Savior; not there. The day dawned warmer. I took a walk in the afternoon sunshine. It's still too early to see signs of Spring. The daffodils, tulips and hyacinth are still cuddled deep in the earth; not willing to risk the bitter winds. The earth is slushy as I walk. The deep frost letting go. The river plays a melody. Content, I walk on. I love and hate this ... View Post
We’ve Always Had Enough
We've always had enough. Never too much. Sometimes barely enough. But enough. He's been my one and only. My farmer. Though, not perfect, we've made our way. We've known heartache and pain, and joy and contentment. People scoff at Valentine's Day. Poking fun. Seeing it as an over inflated, embellished, money making scheme. I'm enchanted. Enchanted by my farmer. Uniquely creating a fun day. The farming way. I may never have had a fancy dinner, jewelry or gifts. Most days I was so exhausted from work, kids, farm work, house work, etc to even remember. But he has ... View Post
Did You Have the Best Day Ever? Day #16 of Thankfulness
It makes a difference. Choosing to have the best day ever. Things weren't perfect. But I worked to make them better. I prayed. I kept my mind focused on things eternal. Isaiah 26:3 You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you. A deep sense of peace filled my being. Because God honors our desire. He longs to walk the journey with us. The sun shone gloriously. On a mid November morning I hung laundry to dry (not freeze dry). Guests in the Guest House sent a message that they would like to make us dinner. Late in the afternoon the ... View Post
There is Strength in the Surrender Day #11 of Thankfulness
It is in the Surrender that we are the most strong. When we lay it all down. That the power is fully engaged. Surrender- to give the control or use of (something) to someone else When we bow, humbly before the Cross. We are strong. 2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." . . . It is funny how that is. The tighter we have a hold on something; the further from our reach. The more we let go. . . the freer we become. My father died on Memorial Day. So fitting for a man so Patriotic. He was staunch in his ... View Post
Walking Through- It Has to be Done
It never goes away you know. The ache. The missing. It's always there. Always. A piece of you. Your child. Gone. It never leaves me. Ever. I think about him all the time. I wonder what he'd be doing. How he would react to something. Yes. Life is ebbing forward. Time. All held in the palm of the hand of the One who called that time into space. We lost our nephew a year ago today. The heart wrenching loss. My farmer's youngest sister. Now a part of the exclusive club no one wants to join. A year since his kids have been wrapped in his loving embrace. Sometimes I can't ... View Post
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