There is much going on here. Wedding planning, haying, farming, a parlor and music room renovation. There is stuff everywhere- on the front porch, in the living room, and in the hallway. Change. The rooms have needed work for years. Neglected in the stream of life. But now. It's time. The rooms have been emptied and the wallpaper taken down. And in the corner have sat Elijah's drums. They have gathered dust and been pushed to the corner. They have become a catchall for random items. They have sat. Unused. Neglected. It's been 8 years since they have been played by their ... View Post
What To Do With Another Birthday
Our Community mourns the loss of another young child. An accident. A bike. A heart ache so deep. We on the farm hurt as we pray for this family and long to ease their ache. Our days have turned to years. 7 years our boy has been gone. Today marks 8 birthdays we've celebrated without him. I never know how to handle this day. Some days I just want to run. Run from the searing pain; The memories and excitement of being a mom. The grace of the years raising children. Other days I want to dig in and remember. To hold tightly to the days and years we had together. I close my eyes and ... View Post
When You Miss Your Son
My farmer walked into church. I stayed at home. He picked up the drum seat and held it up. It is called a throne. He shared, with a shocked congregation, that our beautiful red headed, blue eyed boy, now sat before the ultimate throne. His life ending abruptly. Without warning. No good byes. Finished. While we slept. We went to bed that Saturday evening with no idea we would have unexpected visitors in the early morning hours. Our beautiful son fell asleep at the wheel and met Jesus. He wasn't drinking or speeding. He had plans. He was living his best life. A girl ... View Post
And Time Continues to March On. . .
We dance the dance of life. The newly engaged daughter tries on wedding gowns and we laugh and make new memories. The years flash before me as I watch her walk out in dress after dress. Seeking the perfect match. Searching. Waiting. Hoping. Her dreams are before her. Time, continues to march on. A new journey. Hope. I look at these children of ours. One married with two children. Making a difference in this world teaching. One, newly engaged and chasing the big bad Covid in any way she can. Another with his own business; making his own path, in his own way. The next to ... View Post
Hope and Love
Hope and Love. The first two candles in Advent. Buzz words for sure. Especially love. A term thrown around. Used to make a point. Added for emphasis. Meant to show tolerance. Used to elevate social consciousness. Love. Definition of Christ. One who gave all, for all. John 6:38 For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me. Love personified at Christmas. Born in a manger. Humbled before men. Servant; yet King. Crucified. Glorified. We light these two candles; side by side. One. . . next to the other. Light. Dispelling ... View Post
30 Days of Thankfulness, Day #24 Even Though the Sun Was Shining…
Even though the sun was shining I felt off. The whole day. Tears flowed no matter where I turned. A heaviness seemed to have settled and I couldn't push it off. The weight of all the troubles here seemed insurmountable. Gratitude felt trite and pious. It was a beautiful day. Temperatures warmer. Sun shining in every window. Warmth. Yet it did nothing to stir my soul. It did nothing to change my mood or lift the crushing weight of sadness and heaviness. I puttered through the house trying to tackle the huge list that has accumulated. The mudroom clutter grew as I became ... View Post
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