My brother and his wife are coming for a visit. Now I have known they were coming. But it's not until the last minute that I decide to clean and make a plan. We are celebrating Christmas. I still haven't wrapped the presents. It's almost March. I have wrapped some; but the rest still lie buried under piles of stuff in my room. What makes us all so different? How do some have such ordered and clean homes? Everything is fixed and nice and neat. Everything in its place. ( My college room mate Carol, would continually ... View Post
It Is What Is Unseen, That Makes You Stronger
It is still dark. The rhythm of the day beginning. The sound of the washer and dryer. The beat of the pressing. Dishes, book work, school. Chores. Cold. The milk pump has been running for hours. Soon to have completed it's cycle. The feeding begun. Calves fed. My farmer begins the last full week of radiation. The routine to change; again. This is a change we will embrace. One we will anticipate. But yet, there is still the waiting. The waiting for the toxic cocktails and radiation to complete their work. Long after the ... View Post
Mopping Away The Grit And The Grime
I finger the pages. The pages of the yearbook he'll never see. The 2013 yearbook that holds the memory of the last of his walk on this earth. Graduation and the hope of a future. I waited to look at it. I couldn't bring myself to walk into the pain; the endless sea of grief. But I look and I laugh and I remember. He was so loved. Such a humble young man; so missed. I hear stories from those around us of interactions with Elijah and my heart soars. Isn't that what every mama wants to hear? Stories of your boy and the beauty he left behind. He wasn't perfect. ... View Post
What Really Matters Anyway?
January 11, 2021 I wrote this 7 years ago. I have reposted this today. The grief still stays. It changes. The longing to see my son is still so raw. Yet, my treasure still rests in heaven. I hope you're encouraged by these words. I pray that no matter what your days holds, that you know, "What Really Matters, Anyway?" ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- January 11, 2014 You didn't' store up treasure here on this earth. You weren't here long enough. The things of this ... View Post
I Can’t Grow A Garden, But I Can Plant My Feet Firmly On Solid Ground
My feet are planted firmly on the ground. It's about the only thing I plant. A farmer's wife that can not grow a garden. Can you believe it? It's true. It's the ugly truth. There is nothing green, or any other color, for that matter, that prospers under my thumb. I am more interested in cultivating souls. Cultivating ground that yields to our Savior. Soft earth willing to accept life in Christ. Or the hard packed earth, where trouble and pain have made joy almost obsolete. This is the ground in which I want to plant seeds. Seeds that sow eternal life, grace and peace for the ... View Post
A Sweet Reunion, Saying Good Bye To Grandma Joan
I didn't know her well. Only through birthday parties, drop off or pick ups during custody exchanges. I only knew her through visiting at the grocery store or the Thrift shop. I knew her smile and her love for Chelsea and her infatuation with Christiana; the mini Chelsea. I knew her caring nature in recognizing Elijah's desire to enter the military and the beautiful card and gift she sent for his graduation. One I had to take care of after he had been called home. I know of her intent to hold my hand when my son was called home so suddenly. She too, no stranger to the loss of a child. ... View Post
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