Elijah. They say his name. Cleaning out a closet they find something that was his. Elijah. I just want to hear his name called. I miss saying it. You see when your son is taken. Things change. So when they mention his name. My heart skips a beat. 17 years of memories. His future just beginning. Hope. I long for that which I can not have. We're going to the drive in. A place I have avoided. A place I have tried to find excuses not to go. So far. It's ... View Post
His Room is Still Empty. . .And So Is The Tomb
His room is still empty. I climb to the top of the stairs. It has become cluttered again. . . with stuff. Stuff that isn't his. Extra baggage that doesn't belong there. Our new adventure has consumed much energy. Each time a list complete. . . another, just as long, emerges. Details begat more details. Things we hadn't noticed before, began to come to light. We were taking the time to examine. My quiet time has been filled with me talking. Me requesting. Pushing off time in the ... View Post
Stepping Forward; It’s Been 2 years
I want to stand in front of the pole And will it to not be. As if being there at the time of the accident could stop it from happening. I stare at the pole. Someone has so lovingly mowed this area and planted flowers. The knowledge that someone else remembers fills my aching soul. It is now 2 years since our boy walked this earth. 2 years of walking a path that is rough and ragged. This time has been filled with life - full, and moving on. Some days the moving on is so deeply painful. It takes all I am to ... View Post
When You Measure Life in Months
The 28th has rolled around again. Life is like that. The beat ever steady. Moving forward. Relentless. 22 months have passed. Each day reliving, longing. Trying to shake the words, "There's been an accident." Longing for my boy. Longing for the way things were. Yet, longing to be more like Christ. Yearning to made into His likeness. That my words and actions reflect the deep love He has shown us. And I fall short. My words and actions the very opposite of what they need to be. So, I surrender ... View Post