I've heard it twice. Each time a little different. But I heard it. And when God says something twice you need to stand up and take notice. The first time I heard it. It brought me to my knees. The conviction great. The torment real. The wrestling match begun. The people of Egypt were willing to go back to the land of slavery: the very land that bound them. Back to the people that enslaved them and treated them cruelly. Rather than head into a new land, the promised land, with God. It struck me. Am I willing to go into this new journey, unknown to me. . . with God; without ... View Post
He Will Renew Our Strength
A wife loses her husband and 2 children in a tornado. Just like that. 3 members of their family gone. How does a mom grieve for 2 children and her husband? Her soul-mate. I am familiar with the loss of a child. I know the searing pain. The overwhelming grief. I know the knee bruising prayer of pleas to spare my husbands life. To lose them all at once? My heart snaps. There is so much pain. I read the comments one of the daughter places on Facebook. The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of ... View Post
Trusting Is All I Have
It's the tears that come today. Not the words. Elijah's Baptism here on the farm. Psalm 100:5 For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations. First day of Senior year Psalm 39:4 "Show me, LORD, my life's end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting my life is. Winter ball Senior year Psalm 139:16 Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. The memories ... View Post
When Trusting Comes Hard
I have a confession to make. I don't trust Him enough. At all. I get a call from a friend. She says I am not trying to be a nosy neighbor but I wanted you to know your tractor and manure spreader were stopped by the police. I start to shake. I tell her thank you. I can't stop shaking. I call Gary. I hang up the phone. I sit at the desk and shake. The tank could have flipped. My mind races. I relive the accident night over again. I hear God's voice. Do you trust me enough? My shaky voice answers, No. I don't ... View Post
A Primrose And Rain
A primrose. I bought it the other day. Something about the "living" yellow flower drew me. Because this is my reality at the end of March. I don't know how long I will be able to keep it alive. I water it and move it from sunbeam to sunbeam; when there is one. Today though, there is only the sound of drip, drip. The sound should fill me with glee! It has warmed up enough to rain. Instead I am filled with dread. The basement will flood. What is it like at the barn? What will the river do? This. will. not. be. ... View Post
The Partner That Brings Grace To Your Movements
Sometimes I just want off this road. I've said it before. To me it seems hard. At each door there is pain and heart ache. It's another journey to process and move through. There is a dance while moving through pain. The movements can be stiff and awkward. Or they can be smooth and graceful. When you walk hand in hand with a partner skilled in guiding the way; the movements become fluid. I want things to be fluid. I long for movements that are graceful. What is it that creates the graceful out of the chaos? Who called order into the cosmic ... View Post
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