Each day seems to have it's own rhythm. It is not one I create anymore. I have never been one to have lists. Yet each day flowed. Now, it is different. As I press through the waking and the realization of a new day, I force my way to the coffee. (Ok forcing my way to coffee is a stretch, but the hard reality of the awake is agony) And then to God's Word. I wonder what this day will hold. It is hard to think. It is hard to focus. There is so much that needs to be done. I Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. The weather has been beautiful. Warm, ... View Post
What Does Straight Forward Mean Anyway?
He calls me on my cell. I have just arrived at the allergist for Christiana's appointment. I have cancer he says. I don't feel a thing. Ok. I say. It is rare. Only 30 people in the world have been diagnosed. The first case was in Czechoslovakia. The doctor said I've been talked about all over the world. It should be straight forward. In my mind I think, straight forward? This was supposed to be a cyst. How straight forward is cancer? Pslam 139:13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me ... View Post
Where Do You Put Your Trust?
The day is dreary. Not like the others this past week. It is hard to get motivated to do anything. My mind wanders and sadness fills my heart. I can't escape the longing that tears me apart. I am running out of recent pictures of my boy to post. This pierces my heart. The finality of all this. I still can't believe he is gone. I can't stay in these emotions. They are temporal and shifty. My hope is in the LORD; and that is where I will put my trust. That is where my focus will stay. I will not give way ... View Post
What Does Peace Look Like Today?
John 14:27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. Peace. Isn't that what we all want? Trouble in Syria, Government shut downs, irate workers wielding guns. A world gone mad. Where is there Peace? One party against another. . .each one placing blame. Where does one turn? My son is home with the LORD. His body returned to the ground; never to touch or hear his voice again this side of eternity. We wait for a call for ... View Post
When You Think The Journey Can’t Get Any Harder
I am thankful for the time. I sit in the doctors office. I am writing very over due thank you notes while I wait for my farmer. He is having a simple procedure to remove a cyst from his face. I notice the waiting room start to fill. This doesn't seem like a place that runs behind. I glance at my watch and am shocked to see how much time has passed. I can feel it in the pit of my stomach. Something is wrong. The nurse comes out and ushers me back to the room. My farmer is sitting with his back to me. The doctor shares the news. He could not remove the mass because it is not a ... View Post
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