Happy Birthday To Our Nation, Our Blog And Our Youngest Farm Girl! It's been 7 years; 7 years since I started this blog. 7 years since the kids said a blog is better than long winded posts on face book. I love my kids. And so we entered the world of blogging. It was our daughter's 8th birthday and the 4th of July! Our little firecracker, as Nana called her. Spunky. Cute, Sugar and Spice (emphasis on the spice) And now she's turning 15. She's the youngest daughter of a 3rd generation farmer. She's named after her Grandfather's sister who lived next door. A ... View Post
Why Do Things Feel So Weird?
It shouldn't feel weird. But it does. Easter isn't about anything but the cross. It's about a journey taken for the salvation of our souls. It's about a gift so great, all of creation is affected. Yet, here I sit. Thinking things feel weird. No church. No family gathering. Weird. How must it have felt that first Easter morning- When the sun peeked over the edge of the earth and the rays illuminated the land? The moment where you open your eyes and remember what has happened. The heaviness and ache. The first fluttering thought. The disciples and all the people had just ... View Post
Hot Coffee and Cooler Weather
It's happened. Days without the humidity! Hot coffee. Cooler weather. Sunshine. A light breeze. Oh my. Coffee tastes so good in this weather. I notice the trees. I straighten the porch swing. Maybe a few days without rain will keep it dry enough to be able to swing. Someday we'll replace the tin roof that leaks. Someday. For now. I will just cherish this stretch of cooler weather. I will sip my Hot Coffee and breathe. Hay is down. We're so short on hay. It's been a horrible year for us. I'm not stepping into fear. I don't know what the future holds; but I know who ... View Post
Looking for Joy
The emptiness lingers. The loss of a child. The days march on. The ebb and flow of life. There, in the space, lies the ache. Continual. The child we bore. No more. Their laughter and joy. Snuffed out so soon. The veil between heaven and earth so close. A breath away. The ache can pull one under. A conscience choice each day to step forward in grace. Advent begins again. 4 Advents since he left. 4 Christmases of reaching to hold on. Hope. Love. Today joy. The tree is in. Light illuminates this dark farmhouse. They twinkle and gleam. The house. Transformed; by ... View Post
My Name is Tammy and I Make my Bed Everyday
I haven't showered. Laundry is piled on the floor. Book work stacked on the table and in piles. It's tax time you know. And the beat of that clock is ticking. I can feel it. I make my bed. Yes. In the middle of all the chaos. There is one thing. Constant. I make my bed. What does that say about me? I am sure psycho therapists would have a field day. Of all the things that need to get done. I make my bed. Every day. With out fail. I wash my sheets too. Almost ... View Post
When You Need to Search For Joy On Father’s Day
How can you miss someone when they are physically still here? How can your heart ache so deeply and long for what once was? The memory thief pulls and tugs until there is but a shell. A shell of the person that once was. The strength; staunch independence now shadowed. How cruel it seems to watch. How twisted the path. We are powerless to stop the movement. Helpless to change. Yet we are not without hope. Hope that one day all this torment will be gone. The day when sweet reunions are fulfilled. When pain ... View Post