I want to avoid his room. I haven't been in for a while. Sometimes the weight of the pain is crushing. I bring laundry up the stairs and turn away quickly. I pick up and work for a while. When it's time to go downstairs. I avoid looking. It's been a year. . . and a week. How can I do this long term? How can I survive this piercing pain? Some days it is so hard to function. I am distracted. Unsettled. Sad. Each moment needing to change my focus and reach for more. Seeking the beauty in the ... View Post
When You Run On Empty, You Can Ooze All Over. . .
The kitchen is a mess. We have a house guest coming for 3 weeks. There is no safe way up the stairs and through the hallway with out a navigation system. The lawn needs mowing and I haven't taken time for my heart to be still. You would think after all these years I wouldn't get off track. But I have. Mother's Day, cooking, cleaning, church, games. All important things. But not the things that should matter. Finding that still, quiet time to pour over the Ancient Word is so crucial to my being. And I have filled the space with other ... View Post
Prayer
The Sun streams through the parlor window. It casts a brilliant beam. Christiana calls to me to come and see. It is beautiful. Something so captivating about streams of light. (It could possibly be my ADD) What if we could climb that beam right up to heaven, I ask her. Right up to see Elijah. What would be the first thing I would do if I could see him again? I think I would just fall to my knees, too over come. Oh, to touch him, hear his voice, see those blue eyes. And I wonder. . . Am I that zealous to see God? Do I look at every sunbeam and think about climbing right up to heaven ... View Post