Today is the beginning of Lent. A practice many in the Christian church do not observe. A practice centuries old; representing Jesus' time in the quiet; in the wilderness. It was during this time he was tempted by Satan; Matthew 4:3-4 The tempter came to him and said, "If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread."Jesus answered, "It is written: 'Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.'" It was during this time that he fasted for 40 days. A time when he was tired, hungry and weak. He withdrew from all the chaos and ... View Post
What I Missed This Christmas
I'm pretty sure I took no pictures. I don't have a camera and my cell phone has too many photos. I felt off the whole day. Most of the day I really wanted to be alone. Me; the extrovert. Alone. I watched endless episodes of "Gilmore Girls"; not stopping until I looked at my watch, horrified that it was past the time to go to bed. The house; a wreck. I hardly picked up a thing. I go to bed with an empty feeling. It's not until the morning, when I walk out into the living room and survey the ... View Post
We Danced The Dance Of Laughter
We danced the dance of laughter. A strange sound echoing. Snorts from the youngest of the bunch. Inability to sing grace. Holy laughter. It doesn't happen often. But when it does it captures everyone. Sweeps them into a sea of giggles. For a time lost in sheer convulsions. Holy laughter. It happened. I am so grateful. An evening with everyone home. An intentional effort made, to be together. Priceless. The deep journey of trying to live with something always not right. But isn't that the way it really ... View Post
It Is In The Gentle Whisper. That He Speaks
He's cleaning out. . . his room. My farmer. Spending time in his son's room. Picking through the pieces of a life. A life interrupted. Abruptly. I am left numb. Head gear for Wrestling. His uniform. Still here. A procrastinator; like me. Things we need to return. Dry Erase markers for his white board. His attempt to get organized. His belt. I finger the holes. One by one. I don't want this to be my walk. The burning creeps toward my heart. It feels like it is too much to ... View Post
He Made Me Laugh
He made me laugh. That second born son. The one who shoulders the weight. The future. He made me laugh. He loves Christmas. Always has. Little sleep. So excited. A bundle of joy. Energy. Complying with my request, for a cup of coffee, before presents, on Christmas morning; he will have one waiting. . . long before it is time to be awake. Energy. Sheer joy. Over presents. Over a babe in a manger. Wonder. Contagious. And at 15 that joy is still there. I walk into the dining ... View Post
Can You Stop And Turn? Do You Have What It Takes?
It's the 28th. Sunday. 14 months. Months, days, weeks, moments of missing. Days of seeking who God is; who am I in Him. I wake again today to the fight to get up. My soul is heavy. I cry out to Jesus. I just want to burrow in. Sleep some more. My heart; Needs to change There was a double sleep over last night. Church to attend, a rehearsal for a performance. And it leaves me with tears pooling and a heart constricting. There is no milk. The keys to the van are missing. The other car ... View Post
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