Easter. A day of great joy. Also my birthday. Another new path forged. Days I didn't want to walk through. Yet the beat of time relentless in its march. (Easter 2013) (Easter 2013) Then, the realization that your first born is residing in Glory on this Resurrection day. Oh the joy he experiences on a continual basis. We, a people, just trying to understand with limited minds. I made it through most of the service with out crying. It's the first service since Elijah met Jesus and Gary was diagnosed with cancer, that I haven't dissolved into a weeping ... View Post
A Journey Through The Darkness
The quiet settles in to the farm house. Each to his own space. The little girls tucked in snuggy. The older kids working on school work. The farmer soon to be in deep slumber. It has been a full day. Milking, chores, working on the pack barn. (4-17-13) Dealing with snow and mud. Visits to help heal broken hearts. Conversations about living for Christ. Advice from one close to depression. Visiting hours for the one who gave all. Ending with a band concert. The beat of the day. Pressing on. ... View Post
This Year; I Don’t Want To Read The Annual Report
Yeah; that moment when the Town Annual Report comes. And you remember being excited because in it was the birth of your child. You save it. You want to remember for all of forever how this important monumental event is captured in the Annals of human history for all to see. Your child; in bold letters was born. You horde extra copies like they are gold, so that your son will know what went on in the town during that time. But now. The Annual Report comes. Your heart sinks; your hands shake; your legs give way. You go cold. It ... View Post
Why I Don’t Want To Say Good Bye. . .Again
I don't want to say goodbye to 2013; at all. One might think, why? I should be ready to kiss 2013 Good Bye forever. But I can't. 2013 holds my son. It holds Winter Ball in January. A cruise in February. Mother's Day and every other day when Elijah walked this earth. When he was alive and his future full before him. Where his hopes and dreams were held tightly in the future that was to his. It held boot camp and life. 2013 holds Lacrosse, Memorial Day, Prom and ... View Post
When You Don’t Feel Like Being Thankful. . . Day #23 Of Thankfulness
At times being Thankful is so hard. With all the grief and heartache, all the things that keep going wrong, it's hard to find the breath to be thankful. Inside burns; my whole world seems so fractured. Yet, I want to be thankful. I want to live the life God intended. I Thessolonians 5:18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. It is a decision to be Thankful. It is a lifetime spent seeking for that in which to be grateful; even in adversity. Even when your world comes crashing down, and for a moment ... View Post
To Turn Back Time. . .Day # 5 of Thankfulness
We have turned the clocks back an hour. So easy. Just turn the knob, press a button. Boom. It's finished. We gain an hour. Just like that. Oh, how I long for one more hour. Yet, I think, if I knew; if I knew I had only one hour left with Elijah, would it have changed anything? My mom just left the earth in December. We knew she was dying. We begged the Lord to take her. We told her we loved her over and over. We told her it was o.k. to leave. And it was. It wasn't really, but it was. She had lived a good life-too short in my book. (Though the definition of too short ... View Post
