The day dawned. I stood on the porch; not wanting to be awake. Odd for me. The sun rose to meet me. Much like a year ago. The same sky. The same God. The world just a little older. The vastness of the Universe running through my mind. How Great is our God. Sing with me how great is our God. (Chris Tomlin How Great is our God It's not because of what He's done, but because of who He is. I can not fathom the why. I need to live in the, "what now". There is a life time of living still to be ... View Post
We Yield, He Works, We Rest
Do you stumble out of bed? Is there a longing to pull the sheets over your head and wish the day would go away? I do. The desire to sink into quiet, no schedules, sleep past 5:30, rise to greet me. I always feel the need to be moving. I have to be accomplishing something. Yet somehow I feel as if nothing is ever done. I am just treading water. I stare into the fog this morning wanting to roll over and just shut it all out. I don't want to feel, or work through the day. I have an early morning meeting, the kids school ... View Post
A Recipe To Lighten Anyone’s Load
They ask me to please let them go. I know I am in for a day of it if I say yes. And I know the memories will be lost forever if I say no. My little princess girls want to help their daddy in the wee hours. When the darkness is the deepest. And the Joy Thief can be relentless. When the mundane is elevated. But the farmer isn't himself and that which was once fun for him; now produces anxiety. Once there was joy when the kids wanted to get up to milk. An adventure; counting stars. Sometimes the Northern ... View Post
When You’re Behind Before The Day Has Even Started
The dishwasher hums because I forgot to start it last night. The washing machine whirls because for some reason it stopped full of water. Sometimes our water pressure isn't strong enough and it will stop mid cycle. So I start the dishwasher, get the washing machine going. And I already feel behind. There is laundry and a bag to fill. There is quiet to find and bills to pay; children to teach, a farmer to love. We all have the pull of the urgent. The feeling of being behind. We are defeated before we even start. Steven Curtis Chapman's ... View Post
Falling In Love With My Farmer
About 23 years ago I fell in love with my farmer. His banjo playing, quiet ways, love for God and deep voice, was enough to make this city girl take a look at all she had thought would make her soul sing.The glitz and glam, nice cars, dinners out, fancy diamond studded jewelry (just kidding -but my birthstone is a diamond -lucky me) soon faded to what was real and what really mattered in this world. A look deep into God's word and the Truth that rests there is what makes a girl really want to take notice. Wedding bells gave way to the rhythm of farming and teaching. The loss ... View Post
An Unwanted Visitor Is Trying To Call Again; Depression Is Not a Welcomed Guest
It is one of those days where the gloom threatens to spill over. As I opened my eyes the weight descended. The life without Elijah. Missing his presence in our lives. These days will come. The missing overpowering. The weight of the days necessity looming. I will not give in. Gary speaks of depression. It's been almost 18 years since we walked that weary road. A depression brought on by Elijah's birth and the switch from milking in a tie stall; to over night change to a milking parlor. Now brought on by Elijah's ... View Post