This post says it all. My farmers mom. A repost from 2014. She's been gone 20 years today. It is hard to believe we woke that day and moved and worked without knowing what was to come. It is a reminder to love and keep short accounts. It is a reminder that One came as the greatest symbol of love ever known to mankind. He came as a baby with the hope of eternity for all. Shirley, my farmers mom. You are so dearly missed. Yet your legacy of living as a Servant, loving those around you and creating beauty in everything you touched, lives on forever in your beautiful ... View Post
New Life
I hold her baby. A beautiful bundle of sweetness. I look at this girl. This beautiful mom. I think how blessed I am. I am the step mom. A woman she did not ask for in her life. Circumstances beyond her control. Yet, she has opened her heart and let me in. She has shared so much of who she is with me. She's daddy's girl you know. And another stole her heart. And now I hold her second born. I want to weep. I want to weep for my boy. I want to weep for all ... View Post
Rays of Sunshine
The sun streams through the one window not covered by blankets. My farmer is finishing up chores. The farm boy has come in to play guitar and unwind before he heads to school. How that boy is changing. He is shaking off the ways of this world; letting of of the anger and hurt. Reaching for the holy and true. Slowly the sharp edges are becoming smooth. A bit of grace on the farm. The milk checks grow thinner. The transition date seems miles away. The cold settles in. Much to lead to the path of ... View Post
When the Missing is Deep
Hi Elijah. I miss you so much. They are coming out with a new Star Wars movie. The products are all over the place. It's been so fun to look - at all the stuff. To remember when I was a kid. But then. . . I got to the Lego aisle. And I still can't stop the racking sobs. They threaten to undo me. Our last Christmas together you got a Star Wars Lego kit. You were a Senior in High School. Enlisted in the United States Marine Corps. Yet the one item you pulled yourself away from the family for was, a lego ... View Post
Every Time I See Purple. . . I Think of Her
He wore purple to the Missions Night. Our Youth Pastor. He didn't know it was the Eve of her home going. It made me think of her. She would have loved his outfit. She would have told him. So, I did. And today she's been gone for 3 years. Her smile and laughter missed by all who knew her. This is a repost from last year. It is my walk. The journey God has placed before me. I am grateful I worked through the tough season with my mom to be able to love and serve her in her last days her on this earth. If you have ... View Post
When You’re Decking the Halls and You Feel Like Checking Out
In a moment he was gone. The police stood at my door. Accident. Death. Wake. Funeral. All words connected to my child. What do you call a parent who has lost a child? Who am I? I am broken hearted. I ache from deep within. Year 3 of Christmas without my boy. Year 4 without my mom. I am decking the halls. Playing Christmas music. Remembering. Every ornament I pull out I am reminded. His name; the year. Given by my mom. I quiet the onslaught of grief. The lights ... View Post