Once again I missed it. Someone else brought to my attention the obvious. How God has used his creation to show his heart. Literally. I missed it the morning Elijah stepped into Eternity. The heaven's declared their majesty in the shape of a heart. Psalm 19:1 The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands. I missed the heart. But I caught the colorful display in a picture. It wasn't until later that someone pointed out the heart. . So, I missed it again. In a ... View Post
Just Another Day
3 bags gone. 2 of clutter 1 of trash. The girls were troopers. It was their room after all. They stayed with Sue. I stayed away. I balanced the check book. Folded 2 loads of laundry. Made a cake for death by chocolate. But forgot to turn the oven on. Ooops. Our friends were here from Florida so they brought lunch over. We sat in the sunshine and ate. It was so good to see them. It was so good to be in the sun. We talked about books on tape. And then of course we talked about ... View Post
I Chose An Evening Stroll. How Do You Choose?
It's getting late. Some days farm work feels like it will never end. The cows need more feed. There is not enough grass. It is so hard to stay optimistic. It's a nice night. It is just Ella and I. So we head up to the barn. We walk through the field. The field Elijah and I worked in. The field we wrapped and stacked bales. The memories are so vivid and real. Dobie comes with a load of manure for the pack barn. The rhythm of the day. The comradery of farming neighbors. We chat for a bit. The farmer smiles.Yes, ... View Post
When The Day Begins
Will the overwhelming feeling ever leave? Each morning before I wake. It is there. I fight for each thought. It is those moments I surrender. I breathe deep. Fear not for I am with you. We will make it through this day together. My God and I. He will give me the strength. He will give me eyes to see beyond the pain. He alone will guide my steps. The ache and pain. I hand over to Him. He will bring good from this mess I see. He is the source for my hope and strength. He is the calm in ... View Post
How Does One Let Go, When You Want To Hold On Tight?
How to walk this road; nobody knows. Learning to let go when you want to hold on tight. The future torn from you. Death. The silent thief. Knows no boundaries. Respects no heart. We, a people, not meant for death. Created for life. Abundantly. The searing pain rips through. Again, and again. A walk past the room. A graduation cap and gown. The sound of a siren. Again, and again, the pounding pain. He is no longer here. He is no longer here. There are no coming homes. I do not cook his favorite meal. I write no letters and receive ... View Post
Sometimes, What We’re Given, Is Not What We Want. Can You Relate?
He cracks a joke. His eyes twinkle. He doesn't smile. He doesn't have to; his eyes always have. He participates in a discussion. He prays. My farmer is feeling better. A weight beginning to lift. Even for a moment. His walk with the Joy Thief long. He has continued to climb those walls; doing the hard work. Nothing will ever be the same. But having a piece of him back is exhilarating. I miss his handlebar mustache. A different thief at work. Radiation and Chemo stealing unknown fragments along the way. Sometimes we don't ... View Post
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