Do you think about your legacy?
I try to walk by faith; keeping my focus heavenward-
On Jesus.
I try to surrender my will.
Pray for strength.
Ask for forgiveness.
I fall short.
Each and every day.
I don’t live up to the expectations I know I should.
I fail.
Every single day.
I can’t keep the house clean.
I can’t cook the food fast enough, with enough for everyone or in the way everyone likes.
I can’t ever finish the laundry, book work or chores.
I fail every day.
And every day I am reminded of my failures because they are in front of me.
The dirty house, unfinished dishes, unfinished laundry and book work.
All a failure.
Every single day.
And I think on the legacy.
What am I leaving behind?
He would be 24.
He never made it to 18.
So much left unfinished.
His life now a legacy of memories.
If we are consumed by our shortcomings and failures the enemy, called defeat, rises to power.
All that God has said about us is pushed aside.
It’s easy to believe the enemy’s lies.
It’s easy to believe I am worth nothing, that I am forgotten and not needed.
We are not measured by the cleanliness of our home or the tasks we accomplish.
Our worth is secured in the deep gift of a sacrifice made, once, for all.
This is a tricky season, I have entered.
My babies are not completely launched.
Almost.
Not quite.
I am needed in different ways and life is changing at a rapid rate.
My role is changing.
I need to be reminded of who God says I am.
I need to find solid footing. . .in truth.
What will my legacy be?
I want, more than anything, for people to remember Christ.
I want my life to have always pointed to the One who calls us by name.
I will make Elijah a cake this year.
I haven’t made him one since he turned 17.
Each year his birthday has come around I have had to hold on tightly to steady the earth from moving-
To hold tightly to all I know to be true.
His birthday leaves me breathless and aching more than I can express.
The giving birth-day meaningless and obsolete.
Yet.. . to me it was everything.
He made me a mom.
He called me mom first.
His red hair, blue eyes and lop sided grin were my heart.
His temper and arguing drove me batty.
His wit and charm I miss dreadfully.
Today, I will make an ice cream cake.
I will remember who God says I am.
I will push aside my failings and focus instead on the grace given, for all.
I can’t rewind time and I can’t slow it down.
Each moment needs to be experienced.
Pressed through.
I want to do that well.
I want to live so that Christ is proclaimed in all I do.
Here is a gift God gave us.
He knew Elijah would meet Him on July 28,2013.
He allowed us some very beautiful moments.
Here is Elijah’s Senior Testimony.
Happy Birthday Elijah.
I am so grateful I know where you are.
God, thank you for the ways you have ministered to our family through your people these years.
When Elijah died we began a Memorial Fund with hopes of making a difference in a small way.
Thanks to your generosity we have been able to give 7 Scholarships to deserving High School students and make a donation to our local Middle School to help purchase new stage curtains. It is our desire to seek other partners for donations.
If you would like to make a donation in honor of Elijah’s Birthday, see information below.
Checks can be made out to Fidelity Charitable Gift Fund, memo reference #1068455 and mailed to:
Fidelity Charitable
PO Box 770001
Cincinnati, OH 45277-0053
