Both of my boys are gone.
Both left the same way.
The clothes on their backs, their wallets and a hug for their mama.
So much the same.
Yet different.
That oldest farm boy, a Poole in the delayed entry program for the Marines, never came back.
He hugged me good bye.
His gaze lingered with mine, and out the door he went.
He never came home.
His bed empty.
Clothes on the floor just as he left them.
Gone.
Forever.
Leaving me with an ache that still cuts like a knife.
Now the second born farm boy.
He leaves too.
Clothes on the floor, just as he left them.
The feeling so similar.
I felt it as the blonde haired blue eyed boy turned away from me.
Uncertainty.
Unknown.
An ache.
I didn’t cry.
Gone.
Yet, he is very much here.
And he needs support and encouragement more now than ever before.
He’s embarking on the greatest challenge of his life.
Marine Corps Boot Camp.
I sit in the quiet of the morning.
Christmas music softly plays.
Light illuminates the dark.
Advent.
The season of waiting and preparation.
A time when we reflect.
We turn our eyes to the Author of life.
Contemplating the gift sent; for all.
The Incarnate.
The hope of all nations lies in a manger.
Humble and meek.
It is He that we seek.
Our hearts yearn for peace.
It is in the birth of a little baby that changed the course of humanity.
Heaven reached down to touch earth.
Holiness.
Isaiah 9:6
For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
John 1:5
The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.
Hope rises in the surrender.
I quiet the noises that threaten to shatter my focus.
God reaches in and fills all the dreams and longings.
He pours wisdom and grace out in measure.
We are His people; cherish and adored.
My heart longs for both of my sons.
It will be until eternity before I see one.
The other it will only seem like an eternity.
Find the space to dwell with the Holy this Advent Season.
Let His light shine in you.
May He radiate his unending love in and through you.
Allow His presence to manifest the joy He longs for His people.
As I wrestle through this Advent placing my very best before A Holy God I long to know Him more.
I sense His presence in our midst.
Beautiful words to communicate what is heartfelt and beautiful music. Thank you for sharing!
My heart is aching this Christmas, our second Christmas without our dear, precious daughter, Christin Rebecca, who drowned at the age of 35 in 2016..
Thank you for so beautifully sharing your heart.
Oh Judi! My mama heart aches with yours. This journey is not for the faint of heart. Take Courage as you walk this journey. Be rooted in the Ancient Word that speaks truth to the deepest ache. You are beautiful and loved beyond all measure. I am praying for you right now. May you feel the power of prayer. Thank you for reaching out. We belong to a club we never asked for. Yet belong to a Jesus who called us by name. Things to ponder. Christmas Blessings as you sort through these days.