I needed a reminder today. A reminder to trust and rest, because sometimes the moments are all ok, and sometimes they are not. . . They hurt and it feels like there's no place to go with that hurt. People don't want to hear it. It's been years, so one should be over it. But honestly. . . there's no 'getting over' the loss of your child. And there it is. The pain rears. The struggles around the farm weigh down. . . I run to the only place that brings me strength. Straight to the solid ground. Straight to the Ancient Word. And then I read this from March 12, 2013 and I remember, to trust the ... View Post
The Daily Grind
The Daily Grind. The same. Yet different. The alarm goes off. I snuggle closer to my farmer. These days have been so long and hard. Winters grip is tight. Wood is not burning. I lay my hands on my farmers shoulder as he awakes and silently pray that all he touches today will have success. He rises without a sound. His day has begun. It's 3:15 am. Before he heads to the barn he will make my coffee and bow his knee to the Giver of Life. He will check the boiler here to make sure the fire is going strong. Then and only then will he head to the barn. Once there the daily ... View Post
Breakdowns!
So many breakdowns! It seems like every time I turn around there is something broken, something not working, something in need of repair. It can get downright discouraging. My farmer and coffee buddy have the skills to fix almost all of these repairs. They're amazing. It's fascinating to sit and watch them. They talk back and forth. An idea. A thought. An angle. Always coming to a conclusion to solve the problem. I am in awe of this ability. It is almost holy. The ability to figure out how things work. How was it built? Often their limitations rest not in solving the problem, ... View Post
Warm Weather, Rain and A Roof; A Miracle
They move like a well oiled machine. You can hear their bantering. A sing song like chatter. Moving. Quickly. A miracle. The rain pours down. They work; unphased. It has been a little over 2 and half months since our barns blew down in a windstorm. These months have been harsh weather wise. Snow, wind, sleet and freezing temperatures have impeded progress on rebuilding. Builders in our area have been swamped. Help - just not available. Yet we persevered with the help we had and pole by pole began the rebuilding process. Our coffee buddy, busy with his own farm and ... View Post
30 Days of Thankfulness, Which Way Do We Turn? Day #12
The snow begins to fall. The temperatures have dropped. There is snow on the mountain. It is absolutely breathtaking. The Seasons never disappoint here in the North East. There is beauty every where in every thing. Yet, today I work hard to have my heart match that beauty. I name the things for which I am thankful. Large decisions over shadow each step of our journey. They feel weighty and heavy. So much at stake. My farmer works hard already, now added to his burden are huge decisions. We seek earthly counsel. We storm the heavenlies. With temperatures dropping and the ... View Post
Whoa! We Didn’t See This Coming. . . But God Did
The stars are brilliant. The sky a sea of twinkling lights. Clear and bright. In sharp contrast to the deafening wind. It howls and roars. It is relentless in it's mission. The house shakes with the gusts. At times the sound as if a freight train. I lie in bed wondering if we should head to the basement. Sounds, foreign to us, explode in the night. Just before 3 the power goes out. I walk through the darkness tracking down the breeze. I place a chair under the knob to the cellar door. I examine everything else as the wind continues its war on the outside. Hesitantly, I wake my ... View Post
